You are watching: If you sit on my lap today
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So I"m sitting around wrapping Christmas presents, and I revolve on the telly to see if there"s anypoint on to entertain me while I perform so, and I stumble up on a Rankin/Bass Christmas special on ABC Family. It wasn"t Rudolph, though later in the evening there was a latter-day computer system animated Rudolph in the style of the original that is thoabout horrible and saccharine and also nearly enough to ruin all of my childhood love for all things Rankin/Bass. At any type of price, the present that was on was Santa Claus is Comin" to Town, the one that defines the origin of Santa, via a mail carrier voiced by Fred Astaire, about exactly how he was an orphan on his method to being delivered to the orphanage as a baby when a freak wind lugged him off course to be increased by a family of elves (the Kringles, of course). It then adheres to him via childhood and young adulthood as he becomes the Santa Claus we all recognize and love. I was in the other room and also only paying fifty percent attention as soon as I heard a few snippets of lyrics from a song that Kris Kringle is singing to the youngsters of Sombertown, to whom he is distributing toys. A young Kris Kringle. A young, redheaded, virile and very creepy Kringle. It was right here that things got weird.Here are the lyrics, in their entirety:Oh, what a great girlOh, what a great boyOh what a large smileAll because of a toy!If you sit on my lap todayA kiss a toy is the price you"ll payWhen you tell what you wish for --In a whisperBe all set to pay.If you sit on my lap todayA kiss a toy is the price you"ll payWhen you sit on my left kneeDon"t be stingyBe all set to pay.If whenever you takeYou offer a small backThen whoever before you loveWill provide a tiny love backSo provide a small loveGet a little love backDon"t you have a tiny loveThat you desire to obtain backIf you sit on his lap todayA kiss a toy is the price you"ll payWhen you sit on his left kneeDon"t be stingyBe ready to pay.Now if you sit on my lap todayA kiss a toy is the price you"ll pay!Kris is lucky he didn"t get hauled off by the good people of Sombertvery own to the dour federal penitentiary in surrounding Dontdropthesoapsville.