You are watching: If you sit on my lap today
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So I"m sitting around wrapping Christmas presents, and also I revolve on the telly to watch if there"s noþeles on to entertain me if I perform so, and I stumble up on a Rankin/Bass Christmas special on alphabet Family. The wasn"t Rudolph, though later on in the evening there to be a latter-day computer system animated Rudolph in the format of the initial that is thoroughly horrible and saccharine and practically enough to destroy all of my childhood love for all things Rankin/Bass. At any kind of rate, the present that to be on was Santa Claus is Comin" to Town, the one that explains the beginning of Santa, via a mail carrier voiced by Fred Astaire, about how he to be an orphan ~ above his way to being yielded to the orphanage together a baby once a freak wind brought him off course come be elevated by a family members of elves (the Kringles, the course). It then follows him v childhood and also young adulthood together he becomes the Santa Claus us all know and love. I remained in the other room and also only paying fifty percent attention once I heard a few snippets of text from a track that Kris Kringle is to sing to the kids of Sombertown, to whom he is distributing toys. A young Kris Kringle. A young, redheaded, virile and incredibly creepy Kringle. The was here that things obtained weird.Here are the lyrics, in their entirety:Oh, what a an excellent girlOh, what a good boyOh what a big smileAll because of a toy!If friend sit on my lap todayA kiss a toy is the price you"ll payWhen girlfriend tell what friend wish for --In a whisperBe prepared to pay.If friend sit on mine lap todayA kiss a toy is the price you"ll payWhen you sit on mine left kneeDon"t it is in stingyBe prepared to pay.If whenever friend takeYou provide a little backThen whoever you loveWill offer a small love backSo offer a little loveGet a tiny love backDon"t you have actually a tiny loveThat you want to gain backIf girlfriend sit ~ above his lap todayA kiss a toy is the price you"ll payWhen friend sit on his left kneeDon"t it is in stingyBe prepared to pay.Now if girlfriend sit on mine lap todayA kiss a toy is the price you"ll pay!Kris is lucky he didn"t obtain hauled off by the good people that Sombertown come the dour federal penitentiary in neighboring Dontdropthesoapsville.