Genre: TV (comedy)Premise: A team of young struggling technology entrepreneurs find their fortunes turned upside-down as soon as one of them hits on a genius new means to compress data.About: Spearheaded by one of the funniest writers ever, Mike Judge, “Silicon Valley” is the latest half-hour present coming to HBO. Co-authors Dave Krinsky and John Altschuler worked with Judge before on King of the Hill, and likewise penned the 2007 Will Ferrell comedy, Blades of Glory. The two also have actually a comedy via Steve Carell referred to as Brigadier Gerard about a horsemale throughout the Napoleanic battles. Keeping a busy schedule, they’re likewise eating their spinach in order to write Popeye for Sony.Writers: Mike Judge, John Altschuler & Dave KrinskyDetails: 38 pperiods – undated

Mike Judge

Tbelow are a few world out tright here who have produced movies so great, they get a life time pass via me. That implies I will read anything or watch anything they carry out, no matter how many missteps they make. Mike Judge is just one of those world. I love Office Void so a lot that he can make a movie around old womales knitting and also I would certainly camp exterior the movie theater the day before the movie came out, wearing an old woman costume and also moving an industrial-sized bevery one of yarn.

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Truth be told, I wasn’t the greatest fan of Idiocracy or Extract. They had actually their moments, and also Judge still stuffed some funny personalities in each, however it was the structure that doomed them. I don’t think that’s his specialty. Especially with Extract, which peaked at the midpoint then stumbresulted in the finiburned line.

Luckily, TV isn’t about plot so a lot as character. So it fits him well. I mean, I’m not even a fan of trailer trash humor, yet I’ve more than likely watched half of all the King of the Hill episodes bereason eincredibly various other episode there’d be at leastern one point that would certainly put you on the floor laughing.

So just choose Jar Jar has a life debt via Qui-Gon, I have actually a life debt via Mike Judge. Let’s view what’s going on in this genius’s head.

20-something Thomas has been couch-surfing at one of the many type of “tech frat” houses that dot Silicon Valley. You know what I’m talking about – the sort of location wright here Jesse Eisenberg and also Justin Timberlake partied in the movie, The Social Netjob-related.

But, unprefer Mark Zuckerberg, Thomas isn’t doing so hot. The owner of the house, a mildly effective “White Urkel” named Erlich, has told him that unless he deserve to begin paying rent, he’s out on the street. And out on the street for Thomas implies going back to St. Louis and giving up on his Silicon Valley dream.

Thomas’s friends in the residence encompass a young Indian male that loves Rugby, a babsence male that still wears braces, an Oriental man that can’t say anything without swearing 7 times, and a dude called “Big Head,” who, quite unsurprisingly, has a big head. All these men are rooting for Thomas to figure it out, but it doesn’t look favor it’s going to happen.

Well, not so rapid. After a series of fortuitous occasions, Thomas’s app (a music application that cross checks your music versus other artists’ music to check out if you’re stealing from them) ends up in the hands of 2 of the biggest billionaires in Silsymbol Valley. But not for the app’s original function (upon which everyone agrees sucks, except Thomas). Rather, his application cuts dvery own a song’s default file size by half!

All of a sudden, Thomas is being readily available 30 million dollars from one billionaire and also the possibility to flourish a gargantuan company from one more. In both cases, though, neither man seems to treatment about what Thomas desires the majority of – to change the human being. So he does the unsupposed. He transforms dvery own both guys, joins his buddies, and also starts a brand-new agency of his own.

My first impression of Silicon Valley was… where’s Mike Judge???

I was having a difficult time seeing his voice here. Judge is well-known for producing really out-tbelow hilarious personalities. Yet all the characters right here are traditional. Not necessarily cliché (I’m not sure I’ve watched a non-stop swearing Taiwanese character before) however bland also.

If you look at Office Void, soooooo many type of of those personalities stood out. There isn’t a single character who stood out here. And what’s weird is that it doesn’t also seem favor they were trying to make them stand also out. Wright here was the irony (a straight-laced white man that loved rap)? The distinctive dialogue quirks (“Ummm, yeahhhhh”)? The stselection obsessions (a weircarry out who’s in love through a stapler)? The wacky mannerisms (The stapler man always talking in whispers and mumbles)? Tright here was absolutely NONE of that below.

This leads me to think that Altschuler and Krinskies most likely did a lot of of the composing right here. I’m likewise basing this on the reality that Silsymbol Valley concentrates on the one point Judge is uninterested in, plot. The pilot below is extremely plot-centric and nearly set up prefer a movie. Our main character has actually a goal (figure out just how to market his app), stakes (if he doesn’t, he’s kicked out of the house) and also urgency (he’s got until the finish of the month to do it).

Now, you know just how much I prefer my GSU yet something’s off here. The manuscript was so constricted trying to hit all the plot beats, that it can never soptimal to breathe or have actually fun. Maybe it’s because they only had actually 30 minutes to fit the story into and therefore HAD to framework it tightly. But in this case, it felt choose it sucked all the creativity out of the situations and also the personalities.

I was likewise a little confused by our major character’s purpose. Thomas is a really idealistic person, always saying that he came to Silicon Valley to “adjust the world,” not make money. That ideology also determines the course of the display, as he turns down money and fame to “change the world” through his friends. But exactly how is he transforming the civilization via a music app?

Yeah, I understand the application helps musicians, but that’s a much cry from “altering the world.” This reminded me of a prevalent problem authors run into. They come up with a plot solution that solves a big problem, but it doesn’t gel properly via the various other facets of their story. This Trojan-equine music app solution solves an essential plot problem. It provides our major character a legitimate sounding “failed” principle that have the right to later revolve right into a believable “big” concept. But it does so at the expense of not matching up via our primary character’s ideology.

The writer then deals with a challenge. Does he rebuild the plot suggest to much better fit the character (which, if he desires to make it excellent, is going to take a lengthy time)? Or does he leave it that method and also fudge the difference? Most authors pick the latter because… well, bereason it’s simpler.

The point is, the last never works. If you’re hearing that little voice in your head telling you, “This isn’t functioning. I should settle it,” that voice is ideal 99.9% of the moment. If you view it, readers will view it. It sucks, having actually to rewrite something that’s clever and also smart and also took you a lengthy time to come up via. But I’ve sassist this before and I’ll say it forever: Nobody ever before said screenwriting was basic.

I realize I sound favor a frenzied stock broker screaming, “Sell sell sell!” today yet Silsymbol Valley isn’t a bad manuscript. It’s simply not exceptional. It needed more quirks, more amazing characters, and also it required to have actually more fun. I did wonder a couple of times, but, if I mischeck out the tone. There’s a possibility that the factor there aren’t a ton of laughs below is bereason this is positioned as a dramedy as opposed to a comedy. If that’s the situation, then I came in with the wrong expectations, which obviously affected my opinion. I guess we won’t uncover out until the present hits the air. And because it’s Judge, I’ll be there to discover out.

< > what the hell did I just read? wasn’t for me< > worth the read< > impressive< > genius

What I learned: One thing I learned right here is that if your plot and also framework are also tight, they start to constrict the flow of the story. And that can be deadly for a comedy, which requirements to feel fun. So when you’re composing comedy, yes, make certain the structure is in location, but additionally know that it’s okay to let your characters loose below and there, to let a scene circulation, to not only be consumed with plot explace and also hitting all your beats.

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What I learned 2: Four attributes that make your characters funnier are a) irony b) mannerisms c) obsessions and also d) dialogue quirks/phrases.