l>Ogden Nash | The Boy who Laughed at Santa Claus
The Boy who Laughed at Santa Clausby Ogden Nash
 
In Baltimore there lived a boy.He wasn"t anybody"s joy.Although his name was Jabez Dawes,His character was complete of flaws.In college he never ever led his classes,He hid old ladies" reading glasses,His mouth was open as soon as he chewed,And elbow to the table glued.He stole the milk that hungry kittens,And walked v doors significant NO ADMITTANCE.He said he acted hence becauseThere wasn"t any kind of Santa Claus.Another trick the tickled JabezWas crying "Boo" at tiny babies.He brushed his teeth, they claimed in town,Sideways rather of up and also down.Yet people pardoned every sin,And viewed his antics with a grin,Till they were told by Jabez Dawes,"There isn"t any Santa Claus!"Deploring exactly how he go behave,His parents rapidly sought your grave.They hurried through the portals pearly,And Jabez left the funeral early.Like whooping cough, from boy to child,He sped to spread out the rumor wild:"Sure together my surname is Jabez DawesThere isn"t any type of Santa Claus!"Slunk prefer a weasel of a martenThrough nursery and also kindergarten,Whispering short to every tot,"There isn"t any, no there"s not!"The kids wept all Christmas eveAnd Jabez chortled increase his sleeve.No infant dared cave up his stockingFor fear of Jabez" ribald mocking.He sprawled top top his untidy bed,Fresh malice to dance in his head,When presently through scalp-a-tingling,Jabez heard a far-off jingling;He heard the crunch of sleigh and hoofCrisply alighting on the roof.What great to rise and bar the door?A shower of soot was on the floor.What to be beheld through Jabez Dawes?The fireplace complete of Santa Claus!Then Jabez fell upon his kneesWith cries that "Don"t," and also "Pretty Please."He howled, "I don"t know where you read it,But anyhow, I never ever said it!""Jabez" replied the angry saint,"It isn"t I, it"s you that ain"t.Although over there is a Santa Claus,There isn"t any kind of Jabez Dawes!"Said Jabez then with impudent vim,"Oh, yes there is, and I am him!Your magic don"t scare me, it doesn"t"And unexpectedly he found he wasn"t!From grimy feet come grimy locks,Jabez became a Jack-in-the-box,An ugly toy v springs unsprung,Forever sticking out his tongue.The neighbors heard his mournful squeal;They looked for him, however not v zeal.No trace was discovered of Jabez Dawes,Which caused thunderous applause,And civilization drank a loving cupAnd went and hung their stockings up.All you who sneer at Santa Claus,Beware the fate of Jabez Dawes,The saucy boy that mocked the saint.Donner and Blitzen licked off his paint.
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